PR

so, they're making things out of denim. and they had to run into a warehouse and grab all the jeans and jackets and white cotton they could to get materials for the challenge. and poor chubby chris, bless his artery clogged heart, runs slower than the rest. but i love him. and that dumb bitch victorya (seriously, who spells their name that way?!) totally claimed denim as her own that wasn't. she all but admitted it. a pair of jeans would be laying on the floor and she'd say, "Yeah, those are mine, I think." and chris is too sweet to be like, " 'Cha right, biotch! Finders keepers!" so he let her get away with it. it's okay though, they all got enough stuff.

jillian is making a coat. so is victorya. they worked together on a fierce coat last week. and jillian is pissed about it. wah wah wahhhh.

christian is being super young and totally gay and whining about stuff. and i think chris wants to punch him. ricky is pulling his whole low self esteem thing and is now name dropping all the designers he's worked with. valentino, oscar de la renta, vera wang. blah blah blah.

rami has talked about israel and how he's more fashion forward than american designers. because being 5 in israel totally determines how fashionable one will be.

sweet p, my wonderful tattooed love, talks about her wedding and how her husband has been supporting her financially. go girl!

jillian is totally copying the idea from last episode. a "futuristic coat." ummm...isn't that sort of like an "apocolyptic coat"...? you know, from last week?

victorya's coat looks like shit. and tim thinks so too.

tim thinks rami's has the potential to blow everyone away. thank christ denim cannot be draped.

chris is making a little dress that might be cute. we'll see.

now jillian is crying because she's "bleeding everywhere"...but no one sees the blood. rami and sweet p are trying to talk her out of her nervous breakdown. hopefully.

ricky...ricky's doing (surprise!!) something lingerie-y. a corset. because that's what he does, if you haven't heard. he designs LINGERIE. and wears hats. all.the.time. he even lets us in on a little secret: He sometimes makes HATS out of denim!!!!! of course he does!!! hats for everyone!!!

christian is kind of quiet right now--he got the whining and bitching and "dying of barfness" out of his system. he sort of did a 180 and started prancing around proclaiming he felt super manly working with denim, like he was in a parade. ummm, i don't know about you, but i don't necessarily associate manliness with parades. but that's just me.

oooh! commercial for top chef chicago!!! i love that show and i love that city! it's my new city! it's where i live, fyi! in case you haven't heard...

day 2: jillian is invigorated. maybe it's the cute outfit she's wearing. finally! not leggings!!! a flamenco-ish skirt, but it's cute. she's pulling it off. jillian has good hair, even though she's fucking bland and annoying.

chris...i love chris. he's fabulous and i want him to be my new gay.

victorya's jacket looks.like.shit. horseshit to be precise.

ricky loves his dress. sweet p is afraid hers is hippy dippy. denim has a tendency to do that. jillian is pissed about victorya's coat. she shouldn't worry though, it's fucking heinous.

shockingly, christian thinks he should win. even though he made a jean jacket and jeans. because that's very original. what with the jeans and jackets being the raw materials and all.

runway time!!!!

first up: chris. his dress is boring. 'nuff said. ricky's next. mehh. i could take or leave the dress. sweet p's dres is still hippy-ish, but it's kind of interesting the way she did the pattern. victorya's jacket is good from far but far from good. rami's dress is okay. christian's outfit is...jeans and a jacket. hurrah. jillian's jacket is pretty great, i think.

judging time. nina and michael kors like christian's outfit. hmph. they don't think chris' dress is timeless. nina's glad that rami didn't drape. me too. everyone likes ricky's dress!! yay ricky! now you won't cry!!! you can literally see his self esteem rising. whoop! he's crying. goddamn. he never stops the fucking waterworks. they're not really feelin' jillian's jacket. nina says it's overly complicated. levis lady thinks the red tabs are too much. michael says he wants to see a fabulous model, and her model is not. yay! they love sweet p's dress! it's very chic says michael. sweet p is grinning and glowing. victorya's jacket sucks. just like i thought. and she's trying to make it seem like it was hard work. and michael called the top of the jacket "reconnoitered". i love michael kors. that's a great word. he also said he'd wear sweet p's dress with the right shoes. god, i love gay men.

okay...here we go...who's in? who's out? heidi will tell us. rami's in. ricky won! he'll probably cry. levi's lady old her she wants to sell a limited edition of his dress on levis.com. cool. and he didn't cry!! he's grinning! yay. sweet p's in! christian is in. oh goodness...how tense. chris is in! yay!!!!! now it's down to the monotone bitches. let's hope it's victorya. i hate her and she's mean. jillian's in. yes! that means victorya's out!!! thank god! ding dong the witch is dead!!! backstage everyone is pretending they care. i bet none of them do though. fuck, i know no one cares.

previews for next week sort of insinuate that they will have to make clothes for strippers, or porn stars. or something slutty. i see glittery latex-y fabric. oooooh, it's gonna be good.

aufedershen! (or however the fuck you spell it)